Venting

[AMANDA]

I've Been W/ My Husband Almost 3 Yrs. He's Cheated Since Day 1 I Was Just 2 Blind 2 C The Warning Signs. When We Met He Use 2 Cry About How He'd Never Cheat On Me Cuz 1 Girl He Was W/ Did It 2 Him & He Knew How Bad It Felt. Well 3 Yrs Later The Tears Still Come Easily 4 Him Only Now It's When He's Telling Others How I Don't Care About Him. He Even Told His Family That I Was The 1 That Was Cheating 2 Xplain Why I Left Him 4 Awhile. I Let Him Talk Me N2 Getting Back With Him After A Mth Apart (stupid) He Was Good 4 A Couple A Mths Then He Started Taking 2-4 Hrs 2 Go 2 The Store Which By The Way Is 3 Min's Away. I've Sat There Just 2 C Where He's Comming From But He Always Manages 2 Slip By. He Doesn't Come N At Night Atleast 1nce A Mth. I've Yelled, Cried, Begged, Left. He Apologizes, Makes Promises He Can't Keep, The Tears Start 2 Flow. Here Comes The Worst Part He Knows I Can't Leave Him Again Because Now I'm Dependent On Him. I'm Ill And Getting Worse Daily, Not Much More Than A Year Left, If That. He's All I Have. I Don't Want 2 B Alone W/ This. I've Told Him Plz Just Let Me B Happy. He Can Do Whatever When I'm Gone. Now I Know U Can Hate Some1 U Love. I Also Know U Can Exist But Not Live. Is It All Pointless?

[BROKEN]

Venting i kow how you feel i am in a similar situation you become co dependent almost like this is a normal thing and you know its not but you feel as though there is no way out of it.I started going to counseling adn itis helping me so much.I was reluctant in the begining but now i am glad i am going see when your in such a mess of a marriage like we are sometimes it makes sence when a outsider looking in gives you advice on what to do and how to handl ecertaqin situations and they help build you up an dget your self worth and self esteem back,and then hoepfully one day we can stand up and say I am not going to accept this anymore i am getting closer to it but i am so torn down it is going to tak a while.But hang in there girl I know your pain it sucks!!!

[tdhg]

I am sorry and wish you where here for a hug. It would do me good too. A good cry and some self medication (chocloate swirl icecream) might ease my pain but only for a short time. What a jerk. Shallow too.

[blues jones]

Now that I am married i know how how it would feel if i found out that my husband was cheating. I've been the other women. Between Dec 2000 and Jan 2002 While in the army and stationed at camp stanley Korea. From the first day i arrived there this guy we'll call Tabora took an interest in me and i had just taken a break from my boyfriend at the time. After a couple of months of sleeping togather one morning he turns to me and with a ring in his hand he says I am married but my wife whats a divorce so that she can married another man. I was young and very naive so I believed him. He showed me pictures of his wife shawn and his son xavier and said things like he hated his wife and that she was tring to take his son away from him. Just very hateful things. Despite the affair I always told him that he could work things out with his wife and he always insisted that he couldn't. He went on leave to Arizona to see his family his wife was staying there with his mother while he was stationed in korea. Before he left he told everyone that he was going home to get a divorce and he begged me not to see anyone else while he was gone. When he return he had not gotten a divorce and later I began to learn things about him that disturbed me. He was a liar and he twisted things to keep me coming back until one day he informed me that he had a new friendship with another women on post who was also married. I remember one night after aving sex he turns to me a says if you just wanna chill out sometimes we don't need to have sex. Then he says when he was younger he went on a date with his girl she had gotten drunk and when that went back to hers or his place he wanted to have sex but she didn't so he waited until she passed out and injected her with heroin. I asked him if he knew if she was ok and he said no. Atfer his momment of sharing i began to have less and less respect for him but the relationship continued. He was an E-6 and I was an E-4 and he was my platoon seargent we had to sneek around to see each other because it was against the rules. It was exciting and i kept coming back for more he was a brillant liar. The relationship ended the only way it could badly. The thing that pisses me off is that if he had said he was married from the start the relationship would have never began. I know for a fact that there where countless other women and i feel bad for his wife. I thank JC for one thing the only thing I took from the whole situation I and nolonger naive.