PDA

View Full Version : I'm a fool too.


Explodeintored
09-03-2006, 12:25 AM
I'm new to the forum, and have nowhere else to vent. Hope it's okay.

My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year now. We're expecting a baby boy in November. We even planned on getting married as soon as my divorce was final (which was in August).

And then yesterday, EVERYTHING changed. He was going to spend the weekend at his Mom's house, and I was going to have my girls here alone. At the last minute, I asked him to stay with us. I'm huge and pregnant and exhausted and could really use his help with them. When I asked him, he got really pissed off. I honestly thought he was mad because he wanted to smoke weed with his brothers this weekend. Stupid me. He ended up having his mother come pick him up and take him to her house.

I got home last night and was just innocently looking for a website that I'd forgotten to bookmark in my history. And I see AdultFriendFinder.com. I know that I haven't been on that site, so I look further. I see that he's used his Mom's credit card to buy a subscription.. AND started sending 'winks' to women on the site.

I call him immediately and confront him. He says that he did it Thursday night (even tho my history says otherwise) and that he shouldn't have.. he was just screwing around. (RIGHT.) I was very upset, but I let him go.. so I could continue my investigating. Then I find that he's not only winked at women, but they are specifically from the zip code where he's staying this weekend (which happens to be an hour away from here!), and they're older females. Of course I call him back, he makes more excuses.. and I'm the one that sits up all night crying. We talked for a good while tho, and he "promised" not to do anything wrong. No drugs, no women.

I thought today would be a better day. Maybe give him ONE freebie before I kick him to the curb.. since we're having a baby and all. I tried to call him several times this afternoon and he didn't answer. So, I get the bright idea to hack into his cell phone account and change his voicemail password just to make sure he didn't have any women calling him. Boy... I seem to just set myself up for failure. There's a voicemail on his phone from a Stacy at 3:15am last night. She must have called private, because the message didn't give her number like it usually does. So, I can't call her. Unfortunately. I called and confronted him AGAIN.. he LIED. I led him to believe that I was able to speak to her, just to see what info I could get out of him. So last night while I was up crying, he was calling those stupid chat lines trying to hook up.

This is a COMPLETE turn around from the person I *thought* I knew. He was always the one who said he'd never cheated on anyone, and that he'd break things off before doing something like that. And even after all the **** I've been thru, I was stupid enough to believe him! He really acts like a completely different person, and of course, I hate it!

I'm picking him up tomorrow morning I suppose. I have no earthly idea what to say to him about all this. He doesn't own up, doesn't feel remorse.. can't even say that what he did was wrong. I'm STUMPED!

I really think he would go thru with cheating on me if he was given the opportunity. I've emailed cyberbait and I hope they can help me.
Hopefully tonight I'll get more sleep.. but now I've found these boards..

Oh lord, help me.

markus
09-03-2006, 02:11 AM
All i can suggest is that you put this loser on hold for a while - look after yourself and the baby

SuckerFree
09-03-2006, 07:13 AM
My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year now. We're expecting a baby boy in November. We even planned on getting married as soon as my divorce was final (which was in August).


Sounds to me like he's the fool.

dearjae
09-03-2006, 08:29 PM
I'm sorry that you are going through this, I'm in a very similar situation and I'm also at a loss as to what exactly to do.

My guy is also claiming that he was never really going to take it that far, and I decided to try to get past this but its really hard when he won't even fess up to what he did (or was planning to do). We also have a baby involved, and that just makes it harder.

Sorry that I can't give you much advice, but I thought you could use the sympathy and if you want to keep touch, I'm glad to listen and share any advice if I can figure out my own situation.

littlered
09-06-2006, 11:48 AM
He said that with weed smokers, their emotional "growth" STOPS at whatever age they STARTED smoking weed. I'm talking about regular smokers, here. I experimented with it in my twenties, but now don't like how it makes me feel. Anyway, I don't know how right my counselor friend was....but it does make you think.
You don't need this kind of man. Everything about all this sounds like he's unreliable.