janets
02-17-2006, 11:34 AM
Caught my husband recently having a cyber relationship. He claims he met this girl in a chat room last may and carried on thru the summer but when she was moving and wanted to meet he cut it off.
I found a message on line "missing you at 2:43 a". He left it up by mistake and I saw it the next day. I pretended to be him and emailed the girl. She said she felt my husband was her "mikey on line" but never said anything else. I was so upset when I found out she had contact with him since May, I emailed her directly. My husband had lied to her and told her he was 25 and told her he owned properties and probably other lies. He is really 51 and we've been married 28 years. At first he denied it and then after a week of me crying and showing him articles he realized how much it hurt me. He said he went into chat rooms with alot of people and it was just words. However this girl sent me emails and he contacted her by email periodically saying he missed her and couldn't wait to talk to her again. I also got a few sexual ones too about clothing and positions. Even though it was upsetting it ended up being a wake up call for both of us. We have never had better sex or been closer in years. We are talking more and know that if we let things go again that something similar or worse can happen. I made him email the girl and apologize and he changed his email address and is staying off the internet, only to check mail. He also gave me his password and said he will be open about everything from now on. All that said, I still can't get over what he did to me.
The sneaking behind my back, even though it was with alot of people, bothered me. It also bothered me he had a special connection with this person. He has talked to me but won't give me specifics. He said he said alot of bad things and is embarrassed to say them. I don't know that dwelling on this and forcing him to tell me verbatim what he said will make a difference, but I am having a hard time getting past all this. Should I let go and move on as we are both going in the right direction.
I found a message on line "missing you at 2:43 a". He left it up by mistake and I saw it the next day. I pretended to be him and emailed the girl. She said she felt my husband was her "mikey on line" but never said anything else. I was so upset when I found out she had contact with him since May, I emailed her directly. My husband had lied to her and told her he was 25 and told her he owned properties and probably other lies. He is really 51 and we've been married 28 years. At first he denied it and then after a week of me crying and showing him articles he realized how much it hurt me. He said he went into chat rooms with alot of people and it was just words. However this girl sent me emails and he contacted her by email periodically saying he missed her and couldn't wait to talk to her again. I also got a few sexual ones too about clothing and positions. Even though it was upsetting it ended up being a wake up call for both of us. We have never had better sex or been closer in years. We are talking more and know that if we let things go again that something similar or worse can happen. I made him email the girl and apologize and he changed his email address and is staying off the internet, only to check mail. He also gave me his password and said he will be open about everything from now on. All that said, I still can't get over what he did to me.
The sneaking behind my back, even though it was with alot of people, bothered me. It also bothered me he had a special connection with this person. He has talked to me but won't give me specifics. He said he said alot of bad things and is embarrassed to say them. I don't know that dwelling on this and forcing him to tell me verbatim what he said will make a difference, but I am having a hard time getting past all this. Should I let go and move on as we are both going in the right direction.