wife had lesbian affair

[alphaone]

I have been married for 14 years and dated my wife for 7 years prior to our marriage. We have two children. Recently, I discovered my wife was involved in a lesbian affair with a co-worker. When the discovery was made, my wife admitted the entire affair and told me she wasn't "gay" but was in love with the "person", who was also her close friend. This person was welcomed into my home and attended many family functions. Their sexual experiences went on for only a couple of weeks before discovered. My wife and I are in counseling but she has made an admission that she loves me but is not "in love" with me. With all that being said, she moved out. She called me and stated that she wants to continue counseling to see if we can come back around and begin a new life together. She is the love of my life and I want her back. I am trying to forgive her for her actions and move on. For some odd reason, I feel it easier to forgive her for being with a woman. I know in my heart that if the infidelity had occurred with a man, then the lawyers would aready be drawing up papers. She still works with the other woman daily and she has told me that she is looking for a new job. I know the other woman is still interested in continuing the affair, but both fear that if I disclose the relationship to their firm, they will be released and have kept their distance. Anyone else experiencing a like situation?

[markus]

Your right .. i wish the affair my wife had was with a women
i would have laughed and asked her to keep it going for a bit longer so i can join in
id get the web cam out and bone the pair of them senseless


Problem now for you is that its probably harder to put your relationship right after this because she not only went their because you failed to meet her emotional needs she also may have always been attracted to women and feels ready to become a lembo

You can make changes where you could have failed but theres not much you can do if she decides to become a full time muff diver

[benmac360]

Man, as hard as this may be your marriage is over. When a separation occurs that is a death knell. First thing - do not let her blame you for her affair and do not blame yourself. That is a choice that she made - she could have talked to you and told you her feelings, instead she went behind your back and committed one of the most selfish and emotionally cruel acts imaginable. It really should not make any difference to you that it was another woman - if anything its worse because now she doesn't even know her own sexual orientation. The fact that she moved out means that she is trying out things with this woman to solidify their relationship. The job search is so her firm doesn't find out - its not to get away from this woman to work on your marriage. Furthermore she's going to counseling because she feels guilty and is undecided about giving up the security of your marriage for this person. Do not let her do this to you - this may drag on for months or even years. Start talking to lawyers and know your rights - she'll have control over you as long as she believes that you will do anything to get her back!

[whattodo!!]

I'm in a relationship with another women for 16yrs now, and finding out that she's been having a emotional relationship with her bestfriend from highschool who is married and has two kids. So I can relate to your issue's.

Is she Bisexual??

I like both Sexes, so that is a big problem if she is that!!

Maybe she's finding something in this women that is feeling her needs, that your not at the moment?

Maybe she rather get just oral sex from someone, other than being poked!!
I don't know!
I hate to be so rude, but these are some questions you may need to find out.

[confused]

your wife is / was having an affair!

A Lesbian one at that.

And i am along with Markus....and even said it on another thread...that for some reason i WOULD feel better if my other half had cheated with the same sex....because i then know its not ME he was cheating on...but he was running for a penis..that i just AINT GOT! lol

but..seriously? I don't agree with benmac. Your marriage isn't simply OVER. i mean..you've been together for 21 years for crying out loud!

The first important thing is DEFINATELY for your wife to leave that job. And for you even to confront the other woman....so that she SEES you...and in front of her...your wife needs to tell her..."I WANT TO WORK THINGS OUT WITH MY HUSBAND".....and in front of you.

Just so YOU can see with your own eyes...her "end it" with this chick....and then go to another job.

I would also change the phone numbers.....
yup...and make them unlisted.
Remove ALL TEMPTATION for this chick to contact your chick.

OR MAYBE i would just threaten her! *thinkin hard*...yeah..THATS WHAT I'D DO....(and that's what i've indeed done too!).

If she's all afraid of "corporate" finding out...well...let her know that corporate WILL know if she continues to pursue your wife.

Bottom line? PLAY HARDBALL buddy! YOU'RE the one "w-i-t-h" the BALLS...so USE THEM! Don't let this "chick" bully you and your marriage around. Who CARES if she wants to continue? it aint gonna happen!

Now...after all that is said and done? YOu've got some serious questions to ask yourself...and some serious questions to ask your wife...and some "outside" third party help is required.

period.

Hey....Markus here got hypnotherapy....
myself & tilly & the cheater? We're all going to counseling....
Fooled in Alaska? She goes to therapy on her OWN without the "guy"...to heal an "ended" relationship...

but bottom line is...get some outside opinions...and my suggestion is to get them from experts who've been there..or at least have dealt with OTHERS who have been there...and can start working with you both on moving forward.

If she is the love of your life and you want it to work.
And she is willing to get a new job and wants it to work.

i think we have a unanimous vote here...that you guys' want it to work.
So.....WORK is what its definately going to be...but if you're BOTH prepared....then roll up them sleeves and get busy! get HELP!

[night shifter]

dude you've got nothing to worry about. just forgive her and let it alone.
as far as i'm concerned its harmless. what she going to do, marry her. guess it depends on what state your in.
i'm jealous btw.
the only trouble i have is she stated she had fallen out of love for you? that kind of sucks. that may only have been to buy her more time to didle in the pu-tang.
i still wouldn't sweat it man.
hey, ask her if you can get a taste!
thats so bad! lol. good luck!

[SuckerFree]

God that's hot

[night shifter]

you liked that didn't you suckerfree?
really wasn't meant for a ladies eyes.
i apologize...NOT! lol.:p

[gam3s]

Have a threesome with your wife and her lesbian friend.

[brokenwing]

:D Who said the wife is into SHARING?

[exhausted]

:D Who said the wife is into SHARING?

She would either share or hit the road... :D

[littlered]

You guys are RUTHless! *laffin my lil butt off*