My husband is always on the internet in chat rooms. He stays on from 8 pm untill 1am. Then he gets on again at 6 am before going to work. I asked him about it and he said he cant sleep at night. We just got a webcam and last Saterday he stayed on all night. We only have sex once a week. How can I see how he talks to? What they say? Chat rooms he visits? Please help. I am at the point of filling for Divorce but I need to Know for sure.

Watch cell phone charges, caller ID and booby trap things in the house, cause you never know cheating mate may have someone coming over when ur not home. Unexpected trips alone, a sudden desire to buy new clothes, spending lots of money. Be especially careful when they say "I just want to take this trip alone to find myself.....I need some time to myself...." you'd be surprised what lengths cheaters go to not to get caught. Yahoo mail, hotmail are to name a few where you can receive e-mail without another knowing. Surprise ur mate at work one day, I caught mine in a lunchtime quickie in my Tahoe a block away from his work.

I met a man two and half years ago. He was still married and I was going through a divorce. He told me him and his wife are starting to go through a separation. I of course believed him. Since then he has cheated on me with her after she moved out which took her two years after we met. He cheated on me three times that I know about. She is aware we are together, and is very jealous of me. The reason for their divorce is that she was cheating on him for two years than he found out. He lies to me constantly about everything. He has told me over and over that he loves me and that he wants only to be with me, and that he has made mistakes. I have also caught him in a bar hugging on women, got his voicemail pass code and found out he has been out with women and they call him to make dates. Let me tell you people, if you want to know what is going on in your spouses life, get their pass codes. You learn a lot. Yes it is not healthy, but if you are not sure, check it out. You will find something if they're cheating. I also have his password to his email, and I have also found a lot of messages from him and his ex. Her asking him for sex toys, and other stuff. I confront him all the time, but he is too scared to ask how I know. I am not going to sit around and be cheated on anymore. I do feel trapped, because I work for him, and he does pay my rent, but I figure, he's screwed me so much he deserves what he is going to get. I no longer trust men. i don't think they exist. I have so much pain inside of me, all I do is cry, and yell. I have changed as a person, and I feel bad for my kids. If you are getting cheated on, get out now. Don't stick around waiting for them to change, they won't. Therapy didn't work for us. He went with me and cheated right after. I am very self loathing, and it's no way to feel. I am bitter, and I hope to God I get better.

Girls, steer clear of my cheating no good husband he will take everthing from you and suck the life from your precious soul.

Ive been married to my husband for 4 years, we were together for 2 before that. We have three kids,(all from previous relationships) and I thought we were in love. Things have been a little rough on us lately financially and my health is not the greatest, but I could always count on him to be faithful to me and love me unconditionally. Well, was I ever shocked when I decided to go into my temporary internet files and saw that he had been going into sex chat rooms on the server we use to play games and chat with friends through a messenger. So, I decided after about 3 months of this(and not letting him know that i know about it) that I would go to a friends house, use her computer, make a new sign in name and profile and see what he was up to. Well I found him in a sex chat room, and I started talking to him, took a deep breath, and finished the job( if you know what i mean) for him. Gave him what he wanted! But I also set up for the woman i was pretending to be to meet with him this weekend, and he agreed. I was devastated. I havent said anything to him yet, and I wont. I am going to see if he makes an excuse to go, and if he does, I dont know what i am going to do. But it wont be pretty! I will have to let you know what happens, after the weekend, so until then, DONT TRUST ANYONE! ;)

well at first when i got married it was all nice. we spent alot of time together and then things have been changing he was at the bar all the time then he would miss the time he would be home and i would never he from him then we fell apart he was working and i was working and i found out that he was with another woman and i am now getting a divorce.

I just found out that my husband of two and a half years cheated on me while we were engaged. He has also cheated while we were married at least two times that I know of. One I found out through a message left at his office and another I found an email.

Hi, I have a husband that ive been married to for a year and six months, everithing was going good in our relationship (or so I thought), we have a 1 year old baby. But just today I found out that he's been cheating on me this whole time, and to make matters worse it's with a co-worker that I know cause we happen to work in the same company. I dont know what to do at this moment, i confronted him about it and he didn't even deny anithing. I'm really confused and upset right now, cause I would have never thought this of him, he would alway's say that he would not be capable of doing such a thing, I guess I was just naive and I didn't think he could do such a thing. All I know right now is that once Im off work Im going home and packing and taking my son with me, I have no clue where Im going, but this is the toughest thing that I have ever had to deal with, and honestly I dont think I could ever forgive him, he didn't care about me and my son so now he has to pay the price, and I just wish him the best, hope all the damage he caused was worth it.

I met my husband on the Internet- yes, it was romantic, but I should have known. Old habits die hard. Because he 'works' with the computer, there is no way to know if he 'work's or if he's busy doing something else. Anyway there are several occasions where I find pics and cards and presents from strangers. Of course he has his reasons for seeking alternative outlets. I guess it's ok if you have boundaries, but lately, I have found notes and cards and letters from one particular young woman who seems to be in live with him, and even calling him her bf. I guess she doesnt know he's married, otherwise, I dont think any woman would invest her time this intensely, unless she's desperate to get a ticket out of a country( or whatever reasons they may have), Today, I cannot see the point of me being here for the sake of being together. Being together for the wrong reason is pretty pathetic. There you go, my 2 cents.

I'm sorry to see so much cheating going on and so much unkindness. Do what I did to the cheating bum, divorce him and take him to the cleaners. You will be so much happier with the cheater out of your life. You don't need that crap. Let him go so he can cheat on the next woman. Dont let him bring you down to his level. and Never take him back. Once a cheater always a cheater. I'm so much happier and have more in my life now than I ever had with him. And best of all.....I am free to do as I please. And remember, what goes around comes around

When I was married the first time, my former husband was cheating on me. He was in the service. We lived in Germany. When I found out, I was destroyed. We had only been married for 7 months. While this was going on, I met a man one day...a GI...in the parking lot of our apartment complex. He was separated from his wife. She was getting it on with a number of officers. We hit it off, and fell in love. Several months later, I returned to the States with my cheating husband, and this other man and I kept in contact. He sent letters to me, through my best friend. This was in 1979. We both moved on. My husband divorced me, in 1983, after he graduated from college. I remarried several years later. My husband was wonderful to me. However, I never did get this other man out of my head, or completely out of my heart. Over the years, I often wondered where he was, and how he was. In 2000, we bought a new computer, and for the first time, I was online. One of the first things I did, was to see if I could find out where this man was, and what had happened to him, and mostly to know that he was happy. I was happy with my husband, and child...I just needed to know, perhaps for closure, perhaps out of curiosity. I found him almost immediately. He had remarried- a German woman, and was still living in Germany. Since the first day we talked, which was 3 years ago, we have talked both online, and on the phone, and through Net Meeting, a minimum of twice a day. Most days, many more times. We talk for hours on end. The first night, after we had talked, I felt such overwhelming guilt. Not that I had done anything. Just because of... what would my husband think if he knew that I had located a former lover...someone he knew nothing about. But I couldn't help myself. I continued my relationship with him. Over the course of the past 3 years, we have both fallen out of love with our spouses, and have fallen deeply in love...deeper and more completely than either of us have ever loved anyone. He knows me better than anyone, as I do him. We have done things online, and he has been here to visit me, and it was incredible. Heaven on Earth. It was like we were both finally home...where we belong. I don't know if my husband knows about this or not. I'm positive he suspects something. I've changed so much. I am distant, distracted, short tempered, neglectful of things, uninterested in things that I used to love to do. I read the list on signs of a cheating spouse, and most of them apply. His wife found out about us last summer. We are planning on leaving our respective marriages, to start a life together. We have been trying to hold off leaving until both of our children are just about 18, which will be in another year.
 I am not proud of myself, by any means. I never thought any of this would happen. It certainly was NOT what I had planned, when I decided to look for this man. It's odd though. We've both been married twice, and cheated on both of our spouses with the same person...each other. I guess the bottom line is. This man and I are soul mates. We are the love of each other's life. We know that we are each other's destiny, that we belong together, and that is what we are going to do.

I am a widow of a Vietnam Vet and I met someone who was in his unit in Vietnam and fell in love with him. He told me his girlfriend had died of cancer and he was grieving and he had been married three times. He told me he was coming here to see me (he had been here one time before), but he did not respond and I called where he had lived and they gave me an address in Indiana. I checked and he had moved back with his third wife; he did not tell me, I tried to call and tell him I knew and he finally emailed and said he was staying with her temporarily. Thank God I found out before I committed adultery, there was no sex when I saw him before, because I don't believe in that. I pray for all these people that get involved with people on line and they lie and cheat.

My hubby got caught cheating after I had a visit to the doctor who told me I had HERPES! He said "IT's JUST THE DOG IN ME!" That was his reasoning for the affair & the UNSAFE {no condom} sex that gave he and I both herpes. Watch out everyone!This was after 9 years of marriage and a three year old son. Guess what he's been at work since 5:00am & it's 8 pm now and still not home & no call, this all just came out Tuesday

My Husband of five years is cheating. He always gone, every day he comes home from work and then go back out for 4 or more hours. I told him i know what is going on! He will not talk to me. Just gives me a mean look! I moving out! He is going to come home to a empty house very soon. I'm too young to be by myself all the time.

I am a 31 yr old woman I have been married for almost 14 years, I have one child and my husband has cheated on me at least 5 times I have caught him in the act but he always had a way of making me think that it was my fault that he was cheating anyway that was within the first five or six years of marriage I should have left but I have a very low self-esteem partly because of his being abusive telling me that I am fat, ugly, whatever he feels like saying at the time anyway I have stayed because I was raised that divorce for any reason was just wrong and that I should make it work no matter the cost so I have tried but it seems like he just has this obsession to sex and porn I just dont know what to do something in my gut tells me that he is cheating again and I have been trying to find out but so far have no real proof I do know that he has been on the net looking at all kinds of porn it just makes me sick he has even looked at some gay sites anyway I have been making myself sick with this for a few weeks and I have been trying to decide what to do my family that I have talked to about this say leave him now even looking at porn is adultery I feel like I am nothing to him and I have been seeing a change in the way that he is with our child as well I have pretty much made up my mind that I am leaving... God only knows that no woman or man should ever have to live through this and any woman or man that would have an affair with a married or otherwise attached person is just a piece of shit the same as the one that is betraying the relationship.

my husband is really good in computers, and while i was at work, he stays in the computer all night long, and didn't even bother to prepare something for his kids, and i could not even call home, since we only have one phone line and he is always in there, i work from 5 p.m. to 3 a.m., and i just found out that he is chatting with all the so called "friends" he said., and it's been an issue since then, while we are far away from each other, my husband is cheating on me, i do have proofs and yet he still denying it, now he is somewhere hawaii, the paradise island they called, and he met somebody, that he said is just friend who help him around the place. i know he is cheating on me, and i been hurt by him since we got married 12 years ago, we got two kids, and right now, our marriage is seems to be on the rocks, because he is enjoying his freedom of being away from us. i just don't know how to convince myself that i have to let him go, since he is no good at all. right now, i am in a counseling due to his recommendation because he said, he want us to work our differences and work on our issues, which is kind a hard, since we are to far away from each other. my friends keep on telling me to divorce him, but there is something in my heart telling me, no..... what will i do?

My husband has been looking at porn (particularly females with male parts) for over a year now (we've been married for 2) and I found out about it because he was stupid enough to charge the sites to the credit card bills. Of course my husband denied it, but then admitted that he was only curious and that it would never happen again. Unfortunately for my husband I have a degree in Computer Science so there was nothing that he could do on this computer that would get past me. Well I would find IMs and pictures of women and I would print them up and he would deny it. He almost had me thinking that I was crazy (in which I almost killed myself from depression) but after some time I bounced back. It is now August and my husband still has been looking at these pictures and continues to lie to me about looking at them even with hard evidence. He always eventually admits to it (which I already know that he has) but it has taken it's toll. I can't be married to someone I cannot trust.

My husband and I have been married one year and together 2 and a half. From the day we met he knew all I asked of him was to be honest, I told him I did not want to get in a relationship with some one who was involved--he assured me he wasn't. After we had been dating a while I discovered that when we first started going out that he had been living with his ex-fiance and having an internet relationship with someone else. I thought we had worked through that. A few weeks after I gave birth to our son I was hit with the truth. He had still been in contact with his 'internet friends'- Now several months later more lies have surfaced. I am devastated and cannot think straight half the time. We even went to counseling and he lied to our therapist. He still tells me he wants only me and that he loves me and never wants to be without me....I do not believe him. All the lies have made me numb. After i found some unknown names in a friends list, I started emailing. I even found out he had emailed ones of these girls to ask her to lie to me for him. He still to this day 6 months later can give me a reasons or answers to why all this happened. Am I stupid for staying? I once remember hearing someone say that real love is not supposed to hurt. Is there such a thing as real love? Can a person truly be faithful to another? I know that these answers are yes, because I have truly loved this man and was faithful to him.

My husband of 27 years, is cheating on the net. It has escalated over the last 9 months. He has a web cam and regularly receives photos of women in various states of undress. I recently Intercepted a letter giving him numbers of girls to have sex with in your ( any area near us)area. I am intelligent, no slouch in the bed department, yet he seems hell bent on destroying what he has. I have taken steps to record his infidelity, and he will lose, me the house and the computer which is mine anyway. My husband has admited to cybersex , but says he no longer does it, I think this is bull, as if he is awake he is on the computer. We are supposed to be going into our golden years yet his addiction to the net is making it the wasted years, full of hurt and anger. I feel I cant have sex with him because he is cheating, and lying, and I never know if it is me who turns him on. Cybersex and relationships is cheating, it takes him away from me, and it is always going to be there and the women are never tired or unhappy, and he can screen out the ones with wrinkles . What chance do real live women have to compete with a world of ever ready women on constant tap. I am setting him up to catch him cheating. Then I am off to find peace of mind. He cheats in on room whilst I am in the next, no sane woman would live with that. We can have soul sex so what on earth can these, temporary seions give him that I don't? Very shortly his compulsion will leave him in a small bedsit, no money, no wife or children and no computer, so no access to the women he now has relationships with.